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By: Warbaby

Goddess Warbaby looked down from her lofty perch on high, clicked on F5 and admired the decorations she had applied to the Creature Cave and decided ? yep! That would do nicely for a Creature Party. It had been simply ages since the last one and such a good time was had by all and so many new friendships had be formed she thought that is was about time all the creatures enjoyed a repeat of the experience. The were also a few newish creatures that hadn?t been introduced to others and she had decided that it was about time this was remedied (Goddess Warbaby was in a very decisive mood that day)

She attached the leashes to her creatures, Pywackit, the big ancient angelic Ape; Pywackitplus, the extremely bad tempered Tiger and Syd, the somewhat feminine Cow. Goddess Warbaby pondered for a moment - she always thought pondering was much classier than ordinary ?thinking? -and wondered why Lionhead the developers of B&W hadn?t made the cow a bull and rather more macho than it is. Though, Pywackit and Pywackitplus had been to many shindigs like this before, this was to be Syd?s first party where he would be old enough to drink alcohol and though he was flattered that he would be trusted to act like a mature cow he was also a little scared that he wouldn?t know when he?d had enough to drink and show up Goddess Warbaby, he was also very worried that she would show her disapproval by slapping him around a bit, he hated it when she did that.

Once they were inside the cave Goddess Warbaby released the leashes: ?There you are lad?s you?re on your own now, enjoy yourselves, but remember I?ll be keeping a watchful eye on you all from up there?, she said, pointing to the ceiling of the cave, ?If any of you go over the top and let things get out of hand you know what happens eh??

All three looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and wandered over to a large mound in the middle of the cave, where there was stacked ? in apple-pie order of course ? sheep?s eyeballs, chicken, eggs (though nobody had ever made up their minds which came first, the chicken or the egg) cow?s tongue?s, frogs legs and a huge great pile of Spam goodies which were in varying disguises, in pies, salads, sandwiches and fried-in-batter, plus the obligatory bottle of Tomato Ketchup (for the Spam of course).
?What in BW God?s name is all this, surely we aren?t expected to eat this pile of rubbish?? said Pywackitplus, ?At the last party there were, pigs, cows, horses, sheep, a couple of turtles (for those that liked a challenge with their grub), huge piles of ripe grain, fish by the net-load and even villagers both raw and barbecued? Pywackit being the oldest and goodest and Goddess Warbaby?s favourite looked to the heavens and pleaded with her ?What in hen?s teeth is going on here with the grub, all hell will break loose if the other creatures arrive and find this lot here?? Goddess Warbaby smiled down on her favourite ? she always found it extremely difficult to be mad at him and replied ?No you ninny, that?s not for you creatures, that?s for the other Gods when they drop off their creatures, we?ve got to offer them something and I read that these foods are what they are particularly partial too ? except for the Spam and eyeballs of course, most hate them. The Spams for me and anyone else who has the courage to try a bit of nostalgia for a change and the eyeballs are for God Deimos who?s a bit of an adventurer?, she gave a half smile to herself when she thought about what God Deimos?s reaction to the eyeballs would be ?Your guests will be bringing their own contributions both food and drink, all we are supplying are tit-bits for their Gods and that huge barrel of Best British Ale that?s over there in the corner ? that?s about enough I reckon ? for now anyways?

Reassured all three animals turned on the jukebox that had been loaned by, Creative Lab Sounds, perused the list for a bit, argued on which record they should choose and finally agreed that Great Balls of Fire by Gerry Lee Lewis would be most appropriate. When the music began to play they moved to the middle of the dance floor and began jigging the dances that were peculiar to each and waited for the rest of the creatures to arrive.

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